Armenia: Finding strength through helping others
“Time moves quickly, and we must find ways to keep going, to find purpose in our pain,” said Lana Kochinyan, who lost her husband in the 2020 conflict escalation.
Over the past few years, she has found renewed strength and purpose by helping others like herself through the Accompaniment Program, which was launched by the International Committee of the Red Cross (ICRC) in partnership with the Armenian Red Cross Society. The initiative works with the families of people who went missing in connection with the conflict escalations since 2020.
After her husband was killed, Lana decided to stay back in Vanadzor, Lori province. She had settled in Vanadzor after her marriage, and there was no leaving now that her beloved was buried here. Despite living with the grief of losing her husband and the challenges of raising two children, she found herself wanting to turn her pain and hardship into something more meaningful. She realized that she could find the strength to heal herself by helping others with similar experiences.
So, Lana began volunteering as a psychologist, working with injured individuals and the families of those killed during the conflict escalations. People around her, including relatives, doubted her and questioned the unpaid work she was doing when she had young children to care for. However, she firmly believed in the power of community support, where a group of people can heal and grow together. She recognized the importance of a shared support system instead of suffering in isolation.
The questions and doubts did not deter her, as she was at peace knowing that she was contributing to the greater good by helping her community. In April 2024, Lana started working with the families of missing people as an external psychologist, under the humanitarian mandate of our Accompaniment Program.
She recalls feeling hesitant about sharing her own story the first time a participant in one of the psychosocial support sessions asked her how she had managed to deal with her struggles. But she eventually decided to share her story, including the initial uncertainty and fear she experienced when her husband was reported missing for two months and the ensuing grief after finding out that he was never coming back.
Over time, Lana discovered that sharing her story and experiences often helped the families of missing people process and cope with the uncertainties of not knowing what happened to their loved ones. Slowly, the people she worked with also started to open up and share their stories of loss and despair. Through these support sessions, they were able to find a safe space where they felt comfortable and realized that they were not alone in their struggles.
Lana continues to believe in the importance of living life with a purpose and empathy even in the face of harsh realities and terrible personal suffering.
